Choosing Wisely

This week on Relationship Laws, we’d be tackling;

Let’s begin!!!

I was scrolling through X (formerly Twitter) last week and stumbled upon a thread about romantic relationships.

Going into details, the thread was a story of a young man who started a relationship with a woman because she had all the qualities he thought would make their relationship great and progress to marriage.

The words he kept using over and over were “she was smart and beautiful”.

Unfortunately, he soon realised—albeit the hard way—that although these qualities were “good”, they were not what was needed to sustain their union.

The writer then ended the thread with an open-ended question for people to write out the qualities they thought were necessary for a thriving romantic relationship.

Some re-occurring answers were; kindness, love, patience, physical attraction, love, money, money, money, money—Yes, a lot of people wrote down money a lot 😅—among others.

As important as these qualities look, they’re still not key qualities a romantic partner should have that will sustain and guarantee relationship growth.

When vetting a potential romantic partner, here are the 5 key characteristics to look out for;

1. An emotionally fit partner
An emotionally fit partner is consistently emotionally stable, wise and intelligent.

Emotional stability in a romantic relationship is important because it’s related to low neuroticism.

This is just a fancy word to say that when a person goes through a high or a low, they are still the same person in both situations.

Romantic relationships plus life’s drama will ensure you and your partner go through ups and downs.

When this happens, you’ll be glad your partner is calm, loving and kind in the high and low seasons.

2. A partner with a courageous vision
A person with this type of vision feels like they’re on the path to something great.

They are always actively working towards attaining a goal, task or project. When people do not actively work towards something they get stuck in the cycle of mediocrity.

They will not have the drive to attain anything great in their life or relationship with you.

3. A resiliently resourceful partner
This is the type of person who keeps getting up even after they are knocked down.

They do not give up easily.

To tackle life—as difficult as it is—with someone, you’ll be better off tackling it with someone who gets up each time they get knocked down by life and tries again.

4. An open-minded and understanding partner
This is A.K.A a curious partner.

Having someone who remains curious as a romantic partner will do you a world of good.

Firstly, it means they try to understand your perspectives during misunderstandings without making judgements or assumptions, It also means they listen to you—really listen to you—during conversations and care about what you tell them.

They want to know everything they can about you. It’s easy to form strong emotional intimacy with a curious partner.

Emotional intimacy makes you feel close and connected with your partner in a romantic relationship.

5. A compassionate partner
This is someone capable of compassionate support.

Someone who is there for you on the “low days”.

Someone who will hold you and be there for you when things start going “tits up”.

Someone who understands how you feel and will not judge you for it.

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1. Checking For Emotional Stability
Observe how they handle different situations.

This is an effective way to know the emotional stability of a person.

Do they stay calm and positive when things go wrong? Have open conversations about feelings and see if they understand and care about yours.

Notice if they remain the same person whether they're having a good or bad day.

An emotionally stable partner will help keep your relationship balanced and strong.

2. Checking For Courageous Vision
To identify a partner with vision, ask them about their dreams and what they're working towards in life.

Look for signs that they are motivated and actively trying to achieve their goals.

It's also important your goals and values align with theirs.

A partner with ambition and drive will help keep your relationship moving forward.

3. Checking For Resilience And Resourcefulness
A resilient person doesn't give up easily, even when faced with challenges.

Observe how they handle setbacks and if they keep trying despite obstacles.

Supporting each other during tough times can also reveal their resilience. A resourceful partner will find alternative solutions to problems and keep the relationship strong through ups and downs.

4. Checking For Open-Mindedness and Understanding
An open-minded partner is curious about your thoughts and feelings.

Engage in meaningful conversations where both of you listen and try to understand each other without jumping to conclusions.

Encourage their interest in your life and see if they are kind and accepting, especially when you have disagreements.

A partner who listens and understands fosters emotional intimacy and connection.

5. Checking For Compassion
To find a compassionate partner, notice how they support you during difficult times.

Are they there for you when you're feeling down?

Do they offer comfort and understanding without judging?

Acts of kindness and caring gestures can also indicate their compassionate nature.

A compassionate partner will stand by you during the "low days" and make you feel loved and supported.

As a valued community member, I can assist you in effortlessly attracting your ideal romantic partner and nurturing a satisfying relationship through my simple 3-step method and services;

1. Through the Love Navigator program. It is a tailored coaching program to help you confidently navigate the dating scene. This program will teach you the art of vetting potential romantic partners and mastering the skills to become irresistible to your ideal match. You can express your interest in embarking on this transformative journey here.
You can also opt-in for personalized one-off coaching sessions with me to tackle your romantic relationship challenges and get your personalised roadmap for relationship success.

2. Through this FREE email newsletter, my YouTube channel, and various social media platforms I have an account with, I consistently share the unspoken rules, principles and secrets that guide healthy romantic relationships.
P.S. Follow @chikeoranye on X, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, LinkedIn Threads and Bluesky to stay connected.

3. Through my digital product offerings. They are the tools you need to conquer any obstacle that may arise to threaten your relationship's harmony.

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